Mama's gone? Who knew--because we're HAVING THE BEST TIME EVER.

So Mama took off for the big city. Papa says she'll be back but frankly I have my doubts. Before she left, she: a) took a shower, b) dried her hair, c) painted her toenails, d, e, f) some other girly stuff I can't remember. It was obscene. The way I figure, she's been city-fied--she's gone soft and cosmopolitan. And what does she leave us with? Old Man Turner, sick as a dog, sleeping all day like a good-for-nothing. Thanks for nothing, Mama.

And before Papa mentions it--because I'm sure he's gonna blab to everyone that asks--yes, I had my first baseball practice today; yes, my friend Jon was there; yes, I sat the entire hour on the bench and refused to play. Why? I'm a watcher, friend. I watch. I'm probably watching you right now. Fact is, there was nothing on the line today. It was the first practice! I know how to play baseball! I don't need the basics! I'm watching. I'm analyzing. I'm figuring you out before you even know I'm there. Next Saturday, when practice starts up, guess who's going to know all your moves? Your tendencies? Who's going to know that your first swing always hits the tee? Who's going to know you tend to skip second entirely when running the bases? Who's going to know what you're thinking before you're thinking it?





I am, brother.

We'll see if Pops laments my lack of go-get-'em after next week's practice. Not likely.

Anyway, the old man was feeling much better this afternoon, and we ended up having a pretty great day. Mac-and-cheese for dinner, awesome story time, awesome car parking time, some Inspector Gadget. Then we went to the "other" park, where I busted out my mini-bike again and did my ridiculous sharp turns and super-fast pedaling around the playground. June can pretty much do monkey bars at this point, which makes her the only one in the family who can. I'm not exaggerating--she has a freakish ability to cling and hang on things--like zip lines, for example. You can send her back and forth on a zip line for hours and she never gets tired. Remember how she used to carry around a single bead in her grubby little hand for days at a time? Originally, I thought she was training like monks or Navy SEALS where they keep something painful in their hand to focus their minds at all times--well turns out she was just practicing for monkey bars.

Anyway, before we left the playground I spotted a field full of old dandelions. I recognized the scene was pregnant with photographic opportunities. So, in pictures, we made a VIDEO ESSAY.

"Existence is SO ABSURD. If I have to choose between crying and laughing, guess which door I'm taking?"

"You want me to define 'irony'?"

"Dandelions grow without toiling or spinning, yet I refuse to consider them."

[No caption necessary. Sometimes images speak with more passion than words can imagine.]

"We're all like so many dandelion fluffies. Like fluffies in the wind. Or dust. Dust, too. Dust in the wind."

"I know--I'm A1 adooorable. But you should've seen what Papa saw when he got me up this morning. Let's just say laundry was performed...laundry was...performed."

"You win some, you lose some. I guess that about sums up this old thing they call life. Winnin' some, losin' some...

Unless you play for Cleveland! Ho ho!!! SLAM!!!! In yo' face, Unkie! GG!! Grams, Aunt Jill, all you NW OH'ers!! Slam!!!"

FIN.

Easter bunny!- Henry.

In addition to the tons of candy we acquired at the easter egg hunt, we got kites and a chocolate bunny from the Easter bunny.

In our tradition, mama lets us have at our bunnies in one setting and then throws away whatever remains when we pass out from the sugar rush.

This year our bunnies were rather small and hollow. So after our good lunch, mama let us have them.

Good thing they took Junie's dress off, because she attacked her bunny and made a huge mess.

I munched both ends and turned mine into a telescope.

No one would ever know it was me looking through that bunny!

Neither June or I gave up on our bunnies. June even combined hers with a banana for the perfect favor combo. Maybe it's not a surprise June was awake until midnight!

Easter Sunday-June.

On Saturday night, we ventured over to Greensboro to visit our favorite Mister Paul and Mister Susan. we celebrated the Easter vigil with a trip to our favorite barbeque place- Prissy Polly's.

Of course, this is the nicest Easter shot we got of the kids. Sitting on a stranger's step and I'm not even in my Easter dress.

We got a special Easter surprise with our good friend, Mister Scott, drove up from Fort Bragg for the night. That is one tall guy.

The weather was so nice on Sunday that we decided to visit the arboretum. There was a cameraman there from the news station and he took videos of me running around. We forgot to watch the evening news, so I could be famous in Greensboro right now and I don't even know.

The main reason for our trip was to try out the new kites that we got in our baskets. And no, we didn't fly them close to those huge power lines.

While the boys ran ahead, mama and I took our time looking at plants and these huge wind chimes. I want some for our yard.

Mama particularly liked this flower- the Lenten Rose. She thought it was fitting that they were all blooming at Easter.

Too bad mama forgot my sandals to wear with my pretty dress. She's been waiting a while for me to grow into this dress since Aunt Lillie sent it up last year.

I enjoyed looking at the creek under the bridge. Then I tried to climb over and made it up to that middle rung before mama stopped me.

The boys were trying hard to get the kite up in the air. They got it up a few times, but there wasn't much wind to sustain its flight.

I dismissed all the kite flying and went straight for the playground. Don't I look like such a little kid in this picture? I'm not a baby anymore!

Mama got us to sit still for a second on the playground.

When did we get such big feet? This picture is proof that we are the only kids in the world who can repeatedly say "cheese," but never actually smile.

Mister Paul tried his best "cheese" face. He is so funny.

This is the best shot we got all day. Mister Paul is the greatest!

Of course we sat still for a group shot.

Now everybody act goofy.

And a close-up of my cute round teeth.

My new favorite trick is pretending to be a baby. First, an adult must cradle me like I've seen them hold little babies. Next, I carefully fold my hands together and put them up to my face. Then I quietly say "Waa. Waa. Waa" in a monotonous tone. It really brings down the house.

Before we left mama wanted one more try for a good Easter picture. Henry was ready.

Unfortunately, I started crying as soon as they set me down. Mama and Papa felt pretty bad when they picked me up and realized they set me on top of a pile of ants. I got bit a few times, but some hydrocortisone cream and a nap made everything better.

We left for home at 9pm. Papa hoped it would be late enough that we would all be tired and fall asleep. Too bad I've given up sleeping in the car. Henry fell asleep at 10, but I held out until midnight.

Easter celebrations- June

On Saturday morning, mama and Miss Becky locked Audrey, the dogs and I in the toy room and colored eggs with the big kids. I was not pleased.

Henry had a good time dyeing his egg and had some very pretty ones until he started redipping his eggs in all the different colors.

Both he and Grace were very patient about sharing the colors and had fun using the little wire egg lifters.

There were a couple reprimands of "Don't put your fingers in the cup," but Henry came out fairly dye free.

We liked the blue and green eggs the best.

We had the extreme good fortune of being invited to the neighborhood easter egg hunt.

Here are the rules: if you want to hunt, fill your yard with eggs and the neighborhood kids would travel around the neighborhood and have a separate hunt at every house.

Things got better when we realized 10 kids showed up for the hunt and at least 15 yards were full of eggs.

Things got really great when the organizer didn't want the little kids (4and under) trampled by the big kids. So most of the time, we got a yard entirely to ourselves.

And our heads almost exploded when we opened the eggs and found out that all the childless couples had filled their eggs with at least 3 pieces of candy each. And not just jelly beans. We're talking good stuff like peanut butter cups, nerds, and M&Ms.

Someone caught a butterfly and mama had a tiny panic attack. Papa took this picture. mama wouldn't dream of getting close to it, even if I love butterflies.

Some older girls came along to help the little kids with the hunt. We had fun looking for eggs together.

I didn't get as many eggs as Henry because I insisted on opening every egg I found. But no one cared because i would run around the yards yelling "Eeg! Eeg! Eeeg!" until someone pointed one out for me.

Afterwards, I was very tired and needed carried back tot he house.

We got home and counted out loot. Mama said we could each have 3 eggs after supper, not knowing that equaled over 10 pieces of candy. We were all so loud, the grown-ups were happy to let us have a little computer time.

Thanks for having us up for the weekend, Audrey and Grace!

Back to NC- Henry.

Spring Break (which means no break from me) and the looming wild onions in the yard begging to be mowed proved to be too much for mama and papa. We had to get out of town- fast. Luckily, our North Carolina friends were up for a loud weekend of 4 kids/

It's been really hot down here. It's been above 80 degrees every day since last Thursday, so mama broke out all of the summer clothes and has been having fun showing off Junie's long, skinny legs.

We drove up to the Triad on Thursday night. June and i were so excited, we barely got any sleep in the car, even though we didn't get there until 10:30. I slept about 45 minutes. June didn't sleep at all. You'd figure that we'd be tired, but we only slept in until about 8am.

It was so fun having Audrey and June together. They are both getting tall and starting to talk.

We spent all morning outside enjoying the warm weather. Mama was happy to be within 40 minutes of a mall and took off with Miss Becky to get some shopping done, though she decided she doesn't miss the traffic of living in a city. Why is Hanes Mall Boulevard always packed?

Grace and I were happy to be together again. At the end of last summer, we were both very good at pushing each other's buttons. Though we're still both loud and high energy, we did get along most of the weekend.

June and Audrey got along well too. We were outside all morning until the grown-ups said everyone needed a nap. After a quiet afternoon (mama went out shopping again), papa offered to take Grace, June and I to the castle park. The rest of the adults eagerly accepted his proposal. Mama thinks she got the better deal staying at home with 2 adults and only one toddler.

She forgot how fun it is to only have one kid around. Audrey spent the entire time playing in the water fountain. It started with a sip.

And soon turned into full immersion.

Then she ran straight for a pile of dirt. If filth is a good measure of fun, it was a great day. Audrey had at least 4 outfit changes and June and I left a ring in the bathtub.